"I bet you didn't think you'd spend your Sunday evening this way!" Jim and I laughed as we took a breather from digging a grave. No, digging a grave in rocky ground wasn't one of my plans for the weekend; however, when Jim's wife Jeanne called to tell us that Kinsey, their 11 year old rottweiler, died that day, we knew they could use our support.

Jeanne and Jim dealt with Kinsey's death in different ways; Jeanne was upset, while Jim made jokes. "You're staying for dinner, right? We're barbecuing later." We laughed at the thought, and I was glad that Jeanne wasn't around to hear the joke. Jim offered joke after joke (and I had a few of my own), making our task of digging a grave easier, at least from our perspective. When Jeanne checked on our progress, she didn't appreciate our "black humor", and eventually we stopped making jokes when she was around.

The different types of humor are almost endless. Black humor, situational humor, ethnic jokes, self-deprecating humor, exaggeration, puns (which is one of my favorites), etc. I'm sure you can think of other types of humor. In most humor, I find there's an element of truth. The point of view is slightly off from the normal idea and that's what makes it humorous. In Jeffrey Gitomer's Little Red Book of Selling , he devotes a chapter on using humor to build business relationships. He suggests using self-deprecating humor to get your prospect/customer laughing and show you have a sense of humor, especially about yourself. I work to incorporate humor as much as possible; however, sometimes I don't feel like making jokes or being funny, but those are the times I need to laugh the most.

One suggestion is to avoid humor that offends others. Many stand-up comedians make jokes at someone else's expense. Don Rickles made a career insulting people in his audience; however, when it comes to business or family, you better know what's acceptable or you'll pay for your ill-timed or inappropriate humor. Self-deprecating humor can also be profitable. The winner of the 2006 Last Comic Standing Josh Blue, poked fun as his life with cerebral palsy. In working with Jim on the grave, he forgot that suggestion and his black humor upset Jeanne. It was his method of dealing with the death, but the jokes bothered her, that was the time to stop. When I saw Jeanne's reaction to Jim's jokes, I began making jokes about the comfort of their couch. She got a kick out of those, and so did Jim.

Humor is a great communication tool to bond people together; it can also be used incorrectly, causing hard feelings or lost business. Developing your humor and sharing it at the right time can make tough situations bearable. Now did you hear the one about . .