How we associate to pain and pleasure, that's the key! Recently my wife and I watched the 1962 version of The Miracle Worker starring Anne Bancroft as Annie Sullivan and Patty Duke as Helen Keller. As I watched the movie I realized that Miss Sullivan taught Helen by what she associated to pain and pleasure.

Prior to the Keller family hiring Miss Sullivan, if Helen wanted something she would either grab it or throw a fit to get it. Helen hitting her mother or father was not unusual. The Keller's never punished her, and frequently rewarded her for her behavior with food or giving her what she wanted. Helen learned to associate a positive reward for her bad behavior. When Miss Sullivan joined the family and saw how they rewarded Helen for acting out, she knew the only way to teach Helen was to punish her for bad behavior and reward her for good behavior.

My intention isn't to do a movie recap, but use the movie as an example. The idea of pain vs. pleasure is on my mind after attending the Tony Robbin's Unleash the Power Within weekend in June and the Kevin Hogan's Influence Bootcamp 2006 in February. Both men stressed that the basis for most, if not all our decisions, are based on either avoiding pain or experiencing pleasure. Based on our beliefs, past experiences, and observations, we associate pain or pleasure to decisions we make, need to make, or avoid to make. For Helen, she associated a pleasurable reward for acting out. Miss Sullivan worked very hard to change the idea in Helen's mind that if she hit someone she would be rewarded. If Helen hit Miss Sullivan, Miss Sullivan would hit her back which over time changed Helen's assocation of how to get what she wanted from pleasure to pain.

Pain is a much stronger motivator than pleasure. What decisions are you avoiding because you expect to experience some pain? I have a section of fence that is propped up, and I avoid dealing with it because of the time and money I associate with fixing the fence. I've spent more emotional energy and time worrying about the fence than what's involved to repair it! I know this is a minor example but I hope it gets the point across. I can ignore the problem (avoid what I associate to the pain) but it won't go away until I deal with the cause.

Annie Sullivan also used neuro-association to teach Helen to spell and learn. Miss Sullivan would have Helen feel, smell, and and possibly taste something then Miss Sullivan would spell it in sign language to help her link the letters to the object. We take similar actions every day and may not even be conscious of it. We attach a meaning to something then we react or respond.

As I watched the movie I thought about what Tony and Kevin taught me about pain vs. pleasure as well as neuroassocations, and how Miss Sullivan used them to teach Helen. How can I use them to learn more about myself, the decisions I make, and to make better decisions? If you've never watched The Miracle Worker , I urge you to rent it or watch it the next time it's on TV, it's a fascinating movie to watch and learn.